Subscribe Feed (RSS)Walking The Man - A Humorous Comparison Of Dog Versus Human Senses
October 2nd, 2008 by admin | Filed under Uncategorized.Ah, yes! I finally got the man trained to take me out every morning before he goes to work. I guess that barking and jumping up when he approaches to door finally got through to him.
Ah, yes! I finally got the dog trained to go out for his walk before I go to work. Gee, I’m such a good dog trainer!
Good, we’ll go again to that patch of weeds where all the other dogs leave their calling cards.
Good, let’s go again to that trail by the woods where he can do his business.
Whoa, wait a minute! There’s a strong blast of oil-based solvent. Smells like the neighbor painted his fence with a pungent lime-like fragrance. I wonder if the man can even smell that?
Whoa, what’s that?! Neighbor Bob painted his front fence yellow. I wonder if the dog can appreciate that bright new color?
I love walking down this way. So many new smells this morning. Mmm! What’s that? Smells like someone dropped a piece of fried chicken on the sidewalk last night. I can sense the dander of that cat from up the street. He must have dragged it off. There’s also the aroma of . . . Dang! Why does he have to jerk my leash just as I’m getting into solving the mystery of that chicken grease spot?
I hate walking all this way. Same scenery every morning. Let’s get to the trail quickly. Dang! Whoops, dog stopped dead in his tracks! Why does he have to stop to smell a stupid stain on the sidewalk?
Ooh, the quiet part of the walk. It’s very serene at this end of the block.
Ooh, the noisy part of the walk. I can hears Mrs. Jackson’s teapot whistling and Joe’s power tools making that whining sound in his garage.
Eureka! Here we are at the Grand Central of the dog world. Smells like old Sparky has been here, and Duke left his scent too on that tall weed. Mmm! My nose tells me that Prince, the terrier, has been eating cat food as well as his own dinner. I wonder if the man has any idea of the richness of the news I can pick up from all these aromas?
Eureka! Here we are at the patch of shrubbery where he likes to go. I cannot imagine what he finds so interesting here. Why does he insist on sniffing every blade of grass?
OK. I got all the latest bulletins from the neighborhood. Let’s go back home.
OK. My walk and his business are taken care of. Let’s go back home. Hey, what’s that? A dollar bill in the street! I wonder if the dog even knows what money is? Does that dumb dog even know the value of a dollar?
Hey, what’s that? A dollar bill lying in the street. Not worth picking up. Can’t buy anything for a dollar these days. Now, if it were a TWENTY, I might take notice.
Vince Migliore is a freelance writer with numerous published articles ranging from medical to technical and humorous. He can be reached at mailto:tabcity@aol.com tabcity@aol.com
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